SamppaFIN
10.02.2005, 13:48
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the
words back...or that you could crawl into a hole?
Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....
FIRST TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three
kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo
and a bl_w job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went
back. My husband didn't say a word...he knew better.
SECOND TESTIMONY: I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of
golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using.
After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the
good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could
help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like
playing with men's balls."
THIRD TESTIMONY: My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a
store that sold a variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the
display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.
I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts." My sister started to
laugh hysterically. The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked
away. To this day, my sister has never lets me forget.
FOURTH TESTIMONY: While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler
decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally
able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and
annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start
behaving "right now" she would be punished. To my horror, she looked
me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, "If you don't
let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing
Daddy's pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening after this
enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing.
I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with
my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind
me, were screams of laughter.
LAST TESTIMONY: This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for
two days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the
future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you
predict snow but don't get any?... a true story... We had a female
news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and
didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob, where's that 8
inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the
set but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!
words back...or that you could crawl into a hole?
Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....
FIRST TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three
kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo
and a bl_w job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went
back. My husband didn't say a word...he knew better.
SECOND TESTIMONY: I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of
golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using.
After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the
good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could
help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like
playing with men's balls."
THIRD TESTIMONY: My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a
store that sold a variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the
display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.
I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts." My sister started to
laugh hysterically. The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked
away. To this day, my sister has never lets me forget.
FOURTH TESTIMONY: While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler
decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally
able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and
annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start
behaving "right now" she would be punished. To my horror, she looked
me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, "If you don't
let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing
Daddy's pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening after this
enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing.
I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with
my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind
me, were screams of laughter.
LAST TESTIMONY: This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for
two days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the
future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you
predict snow but don't get any?... a true story... We had a female
news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and
didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob, where's that 8
inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the
set but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!